New Tricks: 27; Old Dog: 0

I hate new stuff. Said this many times. Not only am I an old dog, I’m a LUTHERAN old dog. And we all know Lutherans hate change.

 

Facebook changed. I bitched and moaned about it, but eventually accepted it. And it’s fine.

 

Then my blogspot changed to New And Improved. I REALLY hated that, and still am not fine with the way the posting business part of it goes. But I have no choice.

 

And now we have a new computer. *sigh* More new tricks. Slow going to get the hang of it. All of my purchased games went bye-bye. They don’t work with the new computer. I now have to face uninstalling them all (and don’t quite know how) and reinstalling them (and don’t quite know how). And there are other things that need readjusting too. Just how much would it cost to fly Paul out here to work on our computer?

 

I remember when we first got phones that had the ability to text and to go online. Marv took to it very quickly and can do just about anything on his phone that he could do on the computer. Almost exclusively, I use it to text people and take pictures. While we were in the process of getting the new computer, I had no choice but to use my phone for what I do on the computer. I find the screen way too small. I was able to use my Nook reader for a couple of things and that was a bit better, but the Nook is very old and very cranky. Kinda like me…

 

So the old dog carries on trying to learn all these new tricks. I guess instead of treats for a job well done, I can substitute chocolate or booze. Sounds good to me…

 

 

True Confessions

I know I said in a previous blog that I wouldn’t be baring my soul any more, but some things just need to be said. So judge away…

 

I have NEVER folded a fitted sheet. Ever. Never intend to, either. I’ve seen the youtube videos on how easy it is to do so, but you know what??? I don’t care! I just bundle it up somewhat neatly and place the top sheet (which I can fold VERY easily) on top to flatten it down more and place the folded pillowcases on top of that. Then it goes on the linen shelf in the hall cabinet. (phew…that felt good to get that off my chest)

 

I watch a lot of animal programs on Animal Planet, Nat Geo Wild, etc. Lots of Dr. Pol episodes too. Theoretically, I know how to take care of an LDA in a cow, castrate almost any farm animal, float overgrown teeth in a horse. Lots of interesting stuff. But at the age of 66 I learned something that just floored me. A cow’s udder is NOT just a big bag of milk with 4 openings to get the milk out. NO! Each teat goes to a SEPARATE chamber of milk! I had no idea! It makes sense, though, when you think about it. I mean, I nursed 2 kids. I KNEW the milk was in two separate “bags” and draining one did NOT mean the other one was empty. All mammals are like that. SMH… PS – horses can’t burp or throw up…

 

Every once in a while I will have what I call “marble moments”. Lia came up with that one. It means I do something so stupid that you can almost hear the marbles leaving my brain and rolling around on the floor.

 

More than once I’ve turned on the Keurig, put the coffee pod in, and forgotten to place the cup or mug underneath. Nothing like the sound of hot coffee spilling all over the counter and dripping on the floor…

 

And did you know that if you put something in the microwave but don’t turn it on, the stuff doesn’t get cooked? Same with the oven. You can put that cake pan in and set the timer, but if the oven isn’t turn on…

 

And there’s nothing like getting the dishwasher all set up so that when you get back from shopping you know it will be done and you can put the dishes away. Turns out you have to actually turn the thing on…who knew?

 

At some point I’m going to run out of marbles…

 

 

It’s Time!!

 

In elementary school, either our mom or grandma would wake my brother and me up when it was time to have breakfast and get ready for school. Once we were in junior high (middle school) it was up to us to set our alarms. I would always try and set it as late as possible to give myself minimal time to get ready. That way I wouldn’t brood about the upcoming day as much. Although I had plenty of time on the school bus to do that…

 

I don’t remember ever sleeping through my alarm. And in those days, there was no snooze button. As an adult I don’t recall ever sleeping through the alarm either when I had a job to get to.

 

The older I got, the worse my hearing got. Especially if I was laying on my “good” ear. It wasn’t as important as when I had a job, but if I did want to get up at a specific time for anything, it was a real gamble as to whether I heard the alarm or not. I tried clock after clock after clock. At the store I would try out the alarm to decide if it was loud enough. So many times Marv would get up before me and would eventually hear my alarm going to town and have to wake me up.

 

You might ask why I didn’t get a nice clock radio and wake up to pleasing music. I HATE WAKING UP TO MUSIC!! It just sets my mind on edge like you wouldn’t believe. Same with setting it on a news station. DON’T TALK TO ME FIRST THING IN THE MORNING!! For some reason, an actual alarm doesn’t affect me that way.  

 

Then I got my smart phone. And learned how to set an alarm. I chose the most obnoxious sound I could possibly find and had the volume set as high as it would go. I can hear that. No problem. Unfortunately, anyone else in the house can hear it too. One time when the kids were up here, I had set the alarm to get up for church. Kevin was still sleeping and I was surprised when he got up as well. He said it sounded like a nuclear reactor had gone off. Oops. Sorry.